Do your employees routinely come to you with complaints about each other and expect that you will resolve it? If so, it may be time to for a change! By telling them to deal with interpersonal conflicts on their own before they come to you, you have more time to focus on your work; and you help them develop the ability to handle conflict.

Managers who rush to resolve employee’s conflicts sometimes assume that problem solving calls for a top-down approach. As a manager, you can assert your authority by refusing to let them unload their conflicts on you unless they have attempted to work it out on their own. In addition, if you consistently confront one employee with another’s complaints, you’ll be seen as “taking sides” and creates the perception of bias.

Coaching employees to solve their own problems will initially take more time and energy than handling the conflict yourself. However, in the long term, you’ll create a work environment where conflict management is seen as everyone’s obligation, not just the manager’s job. Below are a few tips to get you started:

  1. Don’t put your employees’ “urgent” issues at the top of your priority list. As a manager you may find yourself spending too much time dealing with issues that are urgent but not important. If you’ve allowed yourself to get drawn into employee problems, making a change may take some work but will eventually reduce the “urgent” problems dropped in your lap.
  2. Train employees in conflict-resolution skills. By beginning with a self-assessment for each employee, you will allow them to better understand their own conflict-management styles and the pros and cons of using a particular style.
  3. Communicate clear expectations. If employees are trained in conflict management and required to follow a specific course of action when conflicts arise among team members you will deal with less employee issues. If the policy is that managers should not be involved in refereeing petty disagreements, the team will be less likely to involve them.
  4. Set specific guidelines. In some organizations, that standard procedure is that if an employee’s behavior is creating a problem within a team, the team is expected to work it out without involving the manager. If this is unsuccessful, the manager can be brought in to make a decision.
  5. Remind employees to focus on behaviors, not personalities. Remind employees to focus on the other person’s behavior and the consequences of that behavior—not on personalities or subjective judgments.
  6. Have an open-door policy—and stick to it. Let employees know that you’re still available to coach them on how to work through specific situations. For example, if they are having s specific problem, you could follow-up meeting to discuss how things are going for the employee. Employees also need to know that if they try and fail to resolve a conflict, you’re available for follow-up guidance.
  7. Know where to draw the line. Clearly communicate that management must always be notified and involved in certain types of conflicts, especially where there are indications of physical violence, harassment, theft, or illegal substance use or possession. Your employees should never be expected to confront violations of the law or to enforce company policy without management’s knowledge.

While it’s impossible to create an atmosphere free of conflict, it is not impossible to enable your employees to learn valuable workplace skills such as conflict management. And bonus: you might just reclaim and protect your own time.

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